The French language

It goes without saying that France is nothing like United States.  Yes, we get along and play nicely together, but at the end of the day, there are quite a few differences that set us apart.  Let me start with the obvious: language. The French language is poetic, flowery, and melodic.  It’s fantastic and things love stories are built around, but it’s also hard to master.  I studies Spanish and Italian and have forgotten most of what I have learned, but if you give me a noun from either of those languages, I can tell you if it’s masculine or feminine, thanks to that handy ‘o’ or ‘a’ at the end of the word.  French doesn’t have that.  It’s the article before the noun that tells is what gender it is: ‘un’ for masculine and ‘une’ for feminine.  So, we need to memorize the gender of all the nouns.  Got that?  I don’t even have a clue as to how many nouns there are in the French language, but I’m going to say more than a few thousands.  A few thousands!  Anytime I have messed up the article, and I’m talking a lot here, I get some pretty blank stares; people have no idea what I’m talking about.  I haven’t even been able to find a mnemonic to help me remember what is what, and it’s not like similar objects are clumped together.  Take this example:

Un tabouret – a stepstool

Un siege – a seat

Un fauteuil – an armchair

Un canapé – a couch

All of these are masculine.

So, why une chaise (a chair)?

Why is a chair feminine?

Wouldn’t it be simpler if all just used to same article?  Why not designate all kitchen things feminine and all garden things masculine?  And then, the noun gender also determines how the adjective is constructed, and that is a whole other ball game.  Basically, that simple article is completely crucial in being understood.  It’s the foundation of all that poetic and flowery stuff, and without it, the language would not be the beautiful thing that it is.

This has gotten my head spinning so much that I think I’m going to need to lie down.

Now, if I only knew how to ask for my bed.